I LOVE MY WORK. Do I?
Well, I did. In a totally different and negative connotation.
It was my first interview. My first (would-be) job. I was excited, obviously. I managed to crack the interview, all the rounds. Glee! Everybody was happy; parents, friends, even room-mates. I was too happy, for I would have lots of money to spend each month.
I joined as a trainee in the prestigious company (I will not disclose the company or my designation). So, the training started. With my Initial Learning Program (or ILP, as it was famously known), I was pushed into the mindless, pathetic bunch of losers who thought this job is a golden opportunity for them to prove something to this world. Alas!
There, for a surprise, I met this trainer who flew down from Chennai to train us and to prepare us (or say, make our brains fit to work for the company). He was charming. Our training batch just fell in love with his aura, his personality. He inspired everybody (including me). In fact, he even made me think that we are not wasting our time in this company and that the company would actually prove as a stepping stone in our respective careers. Thus, the journey began.
So began the twists and turns.
Out of 28 people, 6 of us were females. And, we (especially I) were attracted to this charming trainer. Suddenly, all of his attention fell on me. I was given responsibilities. I was supposed to collect the assignments. I was supposed to bring them to his cabin and sometimes, even manage the batch and see if everything was smooth and nobody behaved undisciplined (it felt like school, at times!). Numbers got exchanged. We started chatting (apart from office as well). My like turned into my hard crush on him. I started day dreaming.That day, it was the second last day of our ILP. We were more into some candid conversations and confessions and experiences. The obvious questions from others “Are you married. Aby?”. Oh yes, I forgot to mention, we used to call him Aby (short for his full name). The reply was shocking for most of us (I was shattered, well kind of!). He was married. He even had a kid (a daughter, which I came to know later, from him of course!).
Last day celebrations; we prepared a memento and a collage. I was supposed to hand it to him. He called me alone. I was reluctant, but nobody doubted him.Only I knew what was about to happen. The crush-thing had taken a dirty turn. He tried to get me into his cabin. I insisted him to come out. Thankfully! He tried to put his hand on my shoulders, casually. I ran. I was too scared because what was happening since few days was bad and mostly NOT right. Since the day I bluntly mentioned that I admired him so much so that he has become my crush, he took that opportunity to try to come close. Things became worse when I had to ignore his calls.
Worse, I could not share with anybody. I consulted a friend from Twitter and she gave away the bitter office truths which was shocking.I thought I was in love (I’ve been this silly all my life!). I’m glad I listened to her and did exactly what she suggested considering my scenario. I cut all contacts from my Trainer.
Later, the company gave me many new and bitter experiences; increasingly deteriorating my faith in the company. However, I did not lose hope. I kept trying to adjust with each shock. I changed my address. Even rented a house nearby office, so that the conveyance is convenient. Gradually, I got sick of everything. The un-imaginable and strange office/shift timings, the pathetic food available, the negativity in the people I worked with, the disgusting attitude of the seniors and the most annoying, the way everything changed me.
People call it my first job; I call it my first bad experience!
— Neha Mishra