Long time ago

 Long time ago, I used to be an engineering undergraduate. Since it was not a choice from the heart, I would go to college rather reluctantly. Luckily, the professors in my department also shared the same passion in being reluctant. Though they did show up now and then for their lectures, most kept their academic involvement with us limited to just that.

The Head of the Department (HoD) , however , was a different case. (Still is. Last heard, he was still going strong at it, both at being a different case as well as at being the HoD ).

He was very insistent about three things. One, that we all came to class, prepared. Two, we take notes as he lectured and three, that he would conduct weekly tests at which we should all perform well.

The first, only the toppers did. The second was easy to do or fake, so most of us did it. But we all struggled with the third. We were Ok with him conducting tests. After all, it was a free country. One could do as it pleased one. But to insist that we all do it well in them, that was a tall order.

We had agreed to taking tests but had absolutely no interest in getting them evaluated. Not even the toppers. Because there was something really off putting about the subject he taught.

The name ‘Digital Signal Processing’ impresses the parents of any engineering student. They will puff up in pride with this simple knowledge that, this is what their son/daughter is studying. But try uttering the same words to the student himself/herself and you would have successfully driven the wits off them.

And any further talk on it, will only cause them to be reminded of its predecessor that they had encountered in an earlier semester, that went by the name ‘Signals & Systems’. It’s a subject everyone has trouble with, though not all admit it and very few manage satisfactory results.

So you can guess what we were going through when the HoD had discussed his plans for us.

Yours truly had, by the grace of God, managed to tackle Signals & Systems at one go. But I was not sure if the same grace would be extended towards all these tests that the HoD had proposed. Nevertheless, there had to be a way out.

I reasoned that since he was using his freedom to set questions, I could also exercise my freedom in providing the answers however I wished to. The following is the outcome of that.
What happened next, is easy to guess.

For, the HoD saw what I had written and had this to say, that he could agree to me not writing the test but not writing such nonsense.

So now, I shall just present to you what I had written and leave it for you to decide.

                                    The f  – domain
Mine’s a modulated life,
Where an odd harmonic or two
Got overlooked
During the filtration process.

The cut- off frequency might have been
Too much.

But no care have I for it.

Don’t I know that life
Isn’t a brick wall response?

T’was a supernatural wish
That I be received thru
A Hash Include io stream.
No simulation
Nor regulation needed.
The reception was
A solid state triumph.

For Shannon, it was math obeyed.

Stepping up in life is
A part of the instruction set.
No description language
Can do any better.
The trick is in finding
The right IF.

Who wants spurious unknowns?

An If loop is what is life.
For every situation, there is
A corresponding solution.
An adaptive expression
That is continuously evaluated
And its values as emotions
Are assigned to us.

No Nyquist was ever betrayed.
Life couldn’t suffice
With a Boolean response.
Decipher it and the algoritms’
All ‘bout tuning and tracking

Tampering is only a jamming signal.

— By Ambalika Bhattacharyya 
     Author of : You Adored, Me Ignored 
 – An initiative to feature notable authors. 
You adored me ignored — By Ambalika Bhattacharyya is the book “In Focus”


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