Gouri Dange, through her book ‘Always a parent‘addresses a very relevant yet neglected stage in parenting.
Parenting is a never ending responsibility. It never ends with kids’ studies, job, wedding, or child birth more so in Indian scenario. In Indian families and many western families, parents play an inevitable role in decision making, even though they stay away. In India, where joint family culture is prevalent, the interference -as children say -or advices/concern- as parents term- , are more of a commonality. We have come across umpteen parenting books that talk about bringing up New borns, toddlers, and teenagers but nothing have been written so far about the further parenting.
While parents consider themselves caring and concerned, their grown up child define their parents as interfering in their personal space. Right from decisions regarding career and marriage, parents tend to mouth their opinion in the financial decisions as well as sexuality. While this should not be viewed as a problem related to parents alone, authoress has attempted an unbiased approach towards the whole scenario. While we mostly see the interference from parents, there are grown up children who takes decision for their aged parents, and moreover impose their opinions and decisions, wherein parents deserved the same personal space that kids demand.
Citing several real life examples, authoress systematically addresses every issue that might aggravate into serious trouble. Each chapter sums up by examining ‘What is the turning point for such equations?’, analysing ‘Cleaning up communications’ and concluding with ‘Parting thoughts’. The part of a child interfering in a parent’s life was not discussed much except a mention of the same. A detailed examination, analysis and conclusion of the same would have made the book complete.
The book targets both parents and children. The highlight is that the book is never going to lose relevance that adult child now can read it as a parent later and can equally relate to the topics discussed.
About the author : Gouri Dange is a writer and family counsellor based in Pune and Mumbai. She is a columnist with several national publications. A strong thread of humour – at times gentle and at times merciless – runs through her works. Music, dogs, the absurdities of city life, food (eating, cooking as well as growing it), cultures vastly different from ours are some of the other areas that she writes about.
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